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Third Choice Keeper

from Forward Defensive by The Humdrum Express

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lyrics

I’m a third choice keeper, rarely called upon
There’s great camaraderie in the goalies union
I’m a third choice keeper, earn a fair amount
Paid each month into my non-savers account

My best performances are witnessed at training grounds
You may have seen me on the bench in the league cup early rounds
I hate coaches’ calls to play out from the back
And the shouts to put my crisps down when facing a counter attack

I’m a third choice keeper, rarely called upon
There’s great camaraderie in the goalies union
I’m a third choice keeper, earn a fair amount
Paid each month into my non-savers account

45 appearances spanning 20 years,
I played 6 times one season – the most in my career
Winner’s medals adorn my walls without playing a game
On each year’s team photo I’m the one that you can’t name

The understudy’s understudy, unsung unique
I rarely work on Saturday’s but train hard in the week
I dream of saving penalties in a shoot out in the cup
But I’m here to make the number of home-grown players up

I’m a third choice keeper, rarely called upon
There’s great camaraderie in the goalies union
I’m a third choice keeper, earn a fair amount
Paid each month into my non-savers account

credits

from Forward Defensive, released June 17, 2022

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The Humdrum Express Kidderminster, UK

Regularly championed by BBC 6 Music and famed for withering critique, The Humdrum Express breezily delivers offbeat observation, social commentary and sharp wit; fused with familiar cultural references, surreal characters and subtle puns.

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